Sad

One of my friends - she's maybe 20 years older than I am - is going through a sad time.

Her parents are both very old. Her dad is failing physically: he has some kind of chronic lymphoma that he's taking chemo for, but he's on the point of asking them to discontinue it. He's a very intelligent and learned man, his mind is still strong, but his body is wearing out. (He's in his early 90s). Her mother is doing OK physically, but her mind is gone: she's had a couple strokes and has advanced Alzheimer's (luckily, she never got aggressive or "wandery" with it). The couple lives in a local assisted-living facility (one of the better ones; luckily, he was intelligent with his investments earlier in life and they can afford it).

The thing is - my friend told me on Sunday - is he's "ready to go" (and as much as she'd miss him, I think she's prepared for that). But, he's terribly worried about what will become of his wife. He knows their daughter will continue to care for her as much as she can, but my friend has grandkids she's helping raise, she has a job herself, she and her husband have cattle to look after. She can't be there with her mother 24 hours a day. She does go over there two or three times a day to help feed her mother; apparently her mother will eat more willingly if my friend is there to help.

My friend said she thought her father was willing himself to hang on for her mother's sake. And that's sad. He's tired, he's fed up with doing the chemo, he's ready to "go home" (he's a man of deep faith and I really don't think death frightens him at all). But he feels like he can't.

The sad thing is, I don't know what to pray for in this situation. It feels very wrong to pray that my friend's mother's life comes to a quick end, so her dad can be released from his worry...but it doesn't look like either of them will see an improvement, either. I don't know. I guess in this situation, if you're a praying person, you just go, "God, You know what's best" and ask for comfort for the family.