Three characters meme

This is to keep me from totally bugging out as I grade papers...

I've seen this lots of places - at Sheila, and Pale Page, and now Nightfly's. So I'm gonna do it. I must warn you, I mainly read mystery novels these days (all my poor overtaxed brain can take), so my choices won't be as literary and intellectual as some

Three characters (at least) you wish were real so you could meet them:

1. Albert Campion. Is he really that "ineffectual" looking? What's his real name, and why did he adopt "Campion" as his nom de guerre? Besides, he's a young-ish, single (at least in the novels I've read) male detective, and that interests me. (And if he really looked anything like Peter Davison, who portrayed him for the BBC, that would be a plus).

2. Nero Wolfe. I like to think he'd appreciate my intellect (and perhaps my legs as well; several times it's reported he positioned a young female witness who was talking to him so that he could see her legs). He is a "difficult" person - in fact, many women repulse him, because they are very utilitarian or they are of a somewhat hysterical bent. I like to think I'd be that rare woman who could keep up with him conversationally and intellectually. (And I don't use "contact" as a verb. And I know the difference between "infer" and "imply.")

3. Merriman Lyon, from the Dark is Rising sequence. He's fascinating - it's implied that he was actually Merlin, somehow kept alive and safe, all these years. He also seems like a very gentle person - with people who are fundamentally good and moral - but also very strong and tough when good people are threatened.

4. Mr. Toad from Wind in the Willows. Oh, I think he'd probably annoy me after a while, but I think it would be fun to meet him.

5. Claudius from I, Claudius. Yeah, it's an odd choice, I know. But ancient Rome fascinates me and also the idea that this guy was such an "outsider" (he stuttered, and apparently had something like epilepsy...). Yes, I know Emperor Claudius was a real person but I'm assuming the fictionalized version is fictional enough to count.


Three characters you'd like to be:

1. Precious Ramotswe, from the Ladies' Detective Agency series. She's wise, she's more than ordinarily perceptive. She also seems to have a good humor and a sort of a quiet way of accepting the things that happen in life. She does not seem to be a worrier and that appeals to me.

2. Elizabeth Bennett. Oh, hell, it would just be FUN. You know it would.

3. Lucy from the Narnia books. What an amazing thing...to walk through a wardrobe and be in a different world. And yet, one that plays by rules not unlike (and perhaps, in some respects, better) than our own. And I'd love to meet the various talking animals. And the description of Lucy and Susan watching Aslan's resurrection is one of the more touching scenes I've read in a book (as either a child or an adult).

4. While we're on the subject of childhood books: Sam from "My Side of the Mountain." I read that book obsessively as a child - I loved the back-to-the-land idea, the thought of being totally self-sufficient. And the thought of being ALONE, without having to deal with any other people. I realized (even as a child) that it was basically an impossible dream - the world I lived in was even then too dangerous for a girl to go out on her own and live in the woods. And besides - running off with just a flint and steel and a pocketknife? I'd miss my books too much. And comfortable bedding. And indoor plumbing.

Three characters who frightened you:

1. I'm going to be unoriginal here and list Cathy from East of Eden. But...she IS scary...as close to a soulless character I remember reading in literature.

2. The Dementors, from Harry Potter. Something that can suck away your soul....ugh. It makes me feel cold just thinking of them.

3. Gollum, from The Hobbit, and later, the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Gollum scared me when I read "The Hobbit" as a child; I think he is even scarier after you learn his origins. I think the whole "soul fallen from grace" (or perhaps rather more, "Soul that voluntarily gave up grace") thing tends to scare me..other characters who were unpleasant but made less of an impression fit this mold.

4. Michael Valentine Smith from Stranger in a Strange Land. Yes, he scared me - there was something MISSING there - something not-right, by earthly standards. And besides - someone who could vaporize you with just an odd thought? That's creepy. I know lots of people regard Stranger in a Strange Land as a real masterpiece but I frankly found it kind of cynical and depressing.